When Cheating Becomes... A Chore

Not too long ago I was invited to a woman's house for just simply oral sex. I missed it so much. Giving oral sex is to me much more intimate than just sex, because it is so much more up close and personal. I do enjoy it the most of all the sexual acts. And this woman was craving it, since most partners did want to fuck her, but did not want to lick her. 

And I loved every single moment of it. It just was delicious. She was clean, sexy and absolutely a Michelin star quality. After she had orgasmed intensely she rewarded me with returning the favor. I have had a number of blow-jobs of different women during my life, but I have to be honest that hardly any was really good or interesting. But this lady was amazing. I could have it going on for hours the way she did it. But the moment did arrive and I enjoyed a very intense orgasm myself.
When I left, she begged me to visit her again soon, when her husband was away. As she did as well through email later on. Even then, although our arraignment was just to have oral sex, she told me that if I accidentally would slide it in, she might not refuse me being inside of her.

Another lady who I wrote with for over a year with who I have a normal friendship, turned the heat up underneath it and invited me over to meet her because her husband did not satisfy her. And she wanted to rent out a motel room so badly to just experience pure lust, the two of us.

I ended up meeting no one. Oh, believe me, parts of me wanted to badly, but it felt just as if it wasn't worth it anymore. I did not cheat often on my wife since I had to confess to her that I did it, now almost three years ago. Actually, I only have been once inside of another woman since then. 
And it is not that the scenery has changed, but more that something feels like it is becoming a bother. It becomes sex for the sex. When I was younger, I could have sex with anyone. I had sex with models, as well as women who were - slightly said - not so pretty. Some where young, some were twice my age. It was more about how sexual someone was that made me want to be with them. And although I behaved so very well before I lost my virginity; I made up a lot after that moment in time. 

But now, especially after I felt the fear of my life slipping away by leaving it in my wife's hand

what to do after I confessed to her, it feels that it should be more than just sex. My body aches for it, begs me to find a woman and just fuck her. But my mind is not that blend. I want to find a woman who is unique, gorgeous, delicious and lovely and smart. I want to be really attracted to her, wanting to be with her and thinking of her when I close my eyes. So that when we can be together alone, the desire and passion is much more intense than a 'quickie'.

I hear my old self beating me up, calling me a fool. But maybe it is more life experience. I would like to be with someone special if I am going to risk it all again. Someone gorgeous, and someone who puts me under her spell. It is too easy to cheat, harder to do it right.

Ahhhh.... Massage!

My wife got me addicted to a maybe healthy addiction. Massages. A couple of months age when I called in sick cough cough for work, she told me to join her for a couple of hours at the spa. As the standard guy of course I did not feel comfortable. Because however I liked the thought of a woman touching me, it is not a manly thing... of course ;) Two hours later I had signed up for the monthly plan.

I may sound so overly sexual here, but it doesn't mean that I am like that in the real life where you would meet me day after day. It took me a couple of visits before I actually went naked. And my wife had no problems with the fact that a young girl would touch me. Well, it was not that weird, because it might sound erotic to people who haven't taken a legit massage, but it is not that erotic at all. But man, it is so delicious.

I actually have behaving pretty well lately, and not been involved with just anyone. I decided that if I want to risk my marriage and my life, she will have to be pretty amazing. I am always looking, but not anymore for just anyone. But that also meant that with sex still being very absent in our marriage, there is a lot less passion to share.

Which, at one moment, got me to a weird idea. Maybe a not so legit massage would be in order. Maybe the thought of a massage parlor that does more than just massage. I was reading up on reviews, and actually there was a highly reviewed one near my work, when I actually thought about that a little bit more.

I will be very honest, the thought to be with a cute - most likely Asian - girl sounds very inviting, especially because the one near my place of work offered to so called full-service treatment (I have learned a lot ;) ). But finally it dawned on me; that is not what I want. Not even because it is actually prostitution. I come from a country where that is very legal, and it was not even that. It was that here, it simply is not that simple. And then the whole idea started to become weird. Was my lust for sex getting so overwhelming that I would not even care if a girl would do it voluntarily or not.

Yes, men can be so stupid from time to time, and really do let their dick think for them.

So what I ended up with was a perfect compromise. I found a legit massage therapist, an older woman. Not beautiful or anything sexual. Also close by, and she actually got great reviews. But the only thing was, that was different from a regular spa, she did not drape you.
So I planned a massage with her, and indeed, there was a nice room, warm, and just a table.

No blanket. And the massage was wonderful. And even though I would love to say that it didn't happen, but when turning around I could not do anything, no blanket to hide my erection. And she massages perfectly around it, neatly cleaning up the pre-cum, while staying so professional. It was incredibly relieving. Somehow, that hour on that table might have been as sexual to me as it could be. Not because of anything happening, but just being me, relaxing, and being just me. Nothing hiding myself, and most likely for her, nothing she has never seen yet. Something about that completely opening up felt so good. And another massage is planned for next week. Ah.

Plain Porn

As you might have noticed, sex is something that is on my mind a lot. Sure, I am a guy, that makes it already a given fact. But actually, it is really on my mind a lot. The erotic state of mind is something fascinating, and watching a female body naked or in such sexual way, is something incredible. Or multiple people in sexual situations always attracted my attention.

Before most boys of my age knew the official word for the female genitalia, I knew them not only how to write and spell it, but could draw them out by mind in any shape or form, simply because the gigantic collection of porn I already collected even before I actually played with myself. When I saw the first time a lady in the nude on a centerfold in a Playboy when I was about 4 or 5, I was hooked. Not that I understood it, or that I knew what it meant; but the fact that there was a magazine published about naked women must have meant that it was something special. I shared this fascination with my friend and while other kids - if they were lucky - tried 'playing doctor' once, we played the artist and his muse. She would pose just like the models in the Playboy and the Penthouses we could get our hands on, and I would draw her. Although I could not yet buy the magazines officially, it was no problem to get my hands on them. And before I even had my first orgasm, I owned more magazines; ranging from simple plain girlie mags to hardcore porn.

Porn and erotica always stayed something important to me. Sure, I love sex, but it is something else. I love to masturbate... simply love it. It is nothing to be compared to sex. Masturbation is selfish, alone, just me. Sex is something completely different. Sure, it has an orgasm as result and has to do with the thing between my legs, but that is where the similarity in my opinion ends.
And it only has been with my wife who actually understood this. And she did also not see it as something that meant I did not want her. I remember the moment when we were not yet even that long together that she was introduced to my collection, and already it became clear to her that it was to me not the dirty ripped apart and stained magazines under the bed. Perfectly ordered, in a couple of book cases, I had everything there. I simply love to see the female body. I love to see my wife's, but just any other too. I can masturbate for hours just looking at female bodies, sex...

The good thing about it and having the privacy for enjoying the self pleasuring is that I got completely comfortable with what I liked, and what not, and understanding that my preferences change. I know I am the cheater here, and that I will not in any way say that watching porn got my lust under control; not at all. But, it did get me to enjoy things that I could not enjoy with someone else.

For example; as you also may know by now, I have a huge passion for an orgasm and women. With which I mean, the male orgasm preferably in women. Porn should not have condoms. Sure, it is the right thing to do in real life, but porn is not real life. And while watching porn, it should stimulate the senses, and condoms just don't do that. My wife hates seeing the 'money shot', but for me, it is so incredibly sexy.

A lot of things I have developed an interest in, without even having experienced ever for real. It is not only the male orgasm on or in a woman that turns me on, but anything liquid that isn't blood. I love to see a woman pee. Never seen it in real life though, and still hope to experience it with someone one time. I don't even have to participate in it, I don't even know if I would like it, but just seeing it would already be a huge turn on. Until that time, photos will help me out enough.

The thing that I enjoyed learning about myself is that age is completely irrelevant to me. A mature lady might be much more sexy than a beautiful woman. It really differs per day, just like the ethnicity I would be interested in. Even the body type can change any moment. It is to me, the beauty is in the erotic mood. I cannot stand the faked sex, which is why I prefer photos over movies. The movies are always so acted, and never well done. Not only that, they are horrible as masturbation material because if you finally found the location you would like to experience your moment-supreme on, suddenly you are looking at the face of the guy at exactly your wrong moment. Photos are nice, and without the fake orgasm sounds.

Over the last 12 years I have had multiple women posing in front of the camera, the shoots that my wife directed and I shot. And seeing that side of the porn industry, the fact that making the shoots yourself is by far not as erotic as you might think, also put things in another light for me. I enjoy porn now as it should; shallow. It is just superficial what you see. And you know what? I don't care. Like snacking something once in a while; you know it is not nutritious, but it is so damn yummie.

I would like to invite all other cheaters also to send me their stories about their experiences, and fill up this blog with more experiences but only mine. I will not post just simply anything, but the stories, confessions and experiences that fit this blog perfectly fine.

Send your postings to letswriteaboutsex@gmail.com
The Honest Cheater

Nepali Passion... How Cheating Can Get Too Risky

There would not be a single man alive, married or not, that
would have been able to resist.

I talk about the cheating from a very objective point of view. It is something I have under control; it is something I plan and find a special place for in my life. Well, that is how it might seem, and what I do try to achieve. But sometimes, something more might happen. Something I try to avoid at all costs is to have to concept of love come between the cheating and my regular life.
But once it hits, no matter how accidentally it might be, how do you get out of it? And do you want to?

I experienced this once. Even though I had been writing with this woman for a time, which was very casual, simple, and mostly because of friendship, we decided to meet. She knew I was married, I knew she was divorced, and we just wanted to meet. Nothing special. Well, nothing special... we had been talking about the lacking of passion in both our lives, and the need for a hug from someone.

But this certain Friday night, we decided to meet and we mentioned this little coffee place for the early evening. But halfway through the afternoon I notice the hesitation, and she called the meeting off, which might have been better anyway. So, I planned the evening alone at home, since my wife was away on a trip. Simply with a pizza and a movie, not doing anything that would be in any way productive.

Adorable, and quite close in
resemblance. Of course, this is not her.
But oh boy, does she bring back
memories.

But just before I settled in, she wrote me asking if I still might be willing to meet her. But since it was already getting later in the evening and the coffee place was closed. She wanted me to come by her place, but then, she did not feel completely comfortable with meeting a stranger at her place, which was totally fine with me. So she asked me to come to her town, and drive under her directions, and then meet here in front of her home.
And so I did. And in the total darkness, an hour later, I called her to mention that I should be somewhere nearby. She guided, and misguided me accidentally, a couple of times, but in the end I arrived, and saw this pretty woman standing outside, with her hands up, waving towards my car and holding a phone. I got out, we hugged, and she walked a little bit with me towards her apartment and guided me in.
We had a wonderful little talk, simple, honestly, and fun. About the things we talked prior to that evening, and why she suddenly wanted to back out, but in the end still decided to meet me. And it was simply a pleasant meeting in which we got to know each other.
Then, when we picked up our drinks and walked to her living room, she put the glasses aside, wrapped her arms around me and hugged me. Simply mumbling barely audible, that she appreciated so much that I was there. I wrapped my arms around her, and we stood like that for a little while. Totally in silence, just a pleasant hug, quietly, safe. Then she looked up, and I looked into her eyes, almost as black as night, almost as black as her long thick wavy hair. Her slightly tinted skin, and it was then that I literally melted in her arms. And without a word being said, our lips touched, and I felt her small pointy tongue find a way to play with mine, and the kiss became long, passionate, something incredible.
While grasping for air, I whispered "I want you..." by which she immediately stopped kissing, looked at me again, and simply asked; "Do you mean that?". Of course I meant it, but I just nodded and everything happened incredibly fast. She dragged me to her sofa, pushed me down into it. Unbuttoned my pants and undid the tie and pulled my lose. Without looking away but gazing into my eyes she removed her black panties from under her dress and crawled on top of me on the couch. I felt her fingers finding my cock, keeping it straight up, and then felt her slide over me, het heat touching me so smoothly and moisty. We did not talk, and she laid her head in my neck and felt her hard breating while she pumped herself on top of me. Her wetness made it so very smooth, her tightness so incredibly sexy, and soon I noticed why she jumped me like that, as she came within the minute while riding me. I felt her squeeze hard with her pussy, the trembling and shaking, and then put my deep inside of her while she experienced the slowly slowing down impact of her orgasm.

Did this just happen to me? I looked at her. This woman was stunningly beautiful. As I mentioned in earlier post, looks usually are not that important to me, it is the sexiness, the lust that my lover has, that makes me so into her. But I could not deny, this woman, let's call her Sara, simply was incredible. And within minutes of walking in the door she threw me on the couch and fucked me? I was still hard as I could be, and after she caught a breath, she bend down a bit backwards, still me inside of her, and apologized for her behavior, but that she had not have any sex since her divorce which was 5 months prior to that.

But while she was explaining, she softly started rocking, keeping me inside, fucking me so tenderly while we were actually having a conversation. And I did not want it to end. And it did not. And she didn't either. She stood up, undressed herself completely, while I did the same thing, and we went into one of those rare nights with hours of sexual play. Sometimes foreplay, sometimes fucking, and sometimes simply laying in each other's arms.
She was so incredible, so delicious, so sexy, that I could not ever refuse her delicious behind. And while licking her, I noticed how she raised her hips, and pulling her butt-cheeks apart, and without hesitation I licked here there too, immediately responded with heavy moaning, especially when I had my finger slide into her too.
Our night of sex brought us throughout her whole apartment, ending eventually with her passionately riding me once again in front of the window, where she at last ignored my warning of me almost coming, and instead looked at me and increased the pace in which the fucked me, and had me this time ejaculate forcefully inside of her. After at least 4 hours of our sexual game we were both incredibly exhausted, and she lay next to me, and we held each other close, kissed softly, and just laid there, on the floor, with each other.

This night was not something normal. When I drove home, I also noticed I could not get her out of my mind. Not just sexually, but how she behaved, how she looked. Two weeks later, just after my birthday, we met again at her apartment. And this time, she opened the door wearing a gorgeous lingerie outfit, lacking the underwear, mentioning that this was my birthday present and she bought it just for me.

Another night of pure erotic pleasure followed, and this time, we made sure it was even more incredible than it already was. I could not forget her eyes, her smile, the soft voice, the exotic looks. I kissed her goodnight way in the early hours of the morning, and noticed how absolutely smitten I was by this lady from Nepal. And that got us both thinking, and she actually wrote me that this might not be good. She knew my situation, I knew hers, and what we could give each other was less than what we wanted to. I am glad she was that strong though. If she would have asked me for other nights, I would not have been able to resist. And it would have become a very dangerous game to play.
I would not be able to resist! I could not even get her out of my mind! And I know by now, even though I might appear to be so in control; we all know I am not.

Because we all know that no man is in control with sex if a woman is involved. Even the promise of sex just makes our thinking blurry. Even if we have the best of best intentions.
Yes, I know, we are the weaker of the sexes... but enjoying it.

Actually, I Have Been Good!

Just... just.... delicious!

So I am writing this blog about cheating and sex. And as you might know by now, I enjoy sex immensely, even when I actually don't have it that often. But even when writing about the sex with other women, it does not automatically mean that my life is boring at home.
Honestly... it mostly is. I have written before that the lack of sex in our marriage is one of the reasons why I ended up looking for it somewhere else.

But don't let me be only about that. There are good sex stories to be found here too. So, it is easy to write about my escapades, but I will let you now into a more intimate area of my life. I will show you a bit of our sex life, when it is actually good. Let me take you away to a couple of weeks ago.

I was visiting a friend and met him in the center of the country. We do that regularly, since we live a continent far away, and twice every year we meet each other in the dead center. We meet each other, and talk about the good old times during the day. And usually when the night falls, in the hotel we each sit on our own bed, masturbating to porn. We know each other now for eons, and since we both started noticing our interest in women, it started out by swapping out each other's Playboys and Penthouses. We are now 20 years further down the line, and now it is watching porn and jerking off. No, nothing else. It is just that missing the sexual freedom at home, it is a relief to just be yourself and let yourself go.
This year, we actually had the possibility of being with a woman, but we both resisted the temptation to cheat. And we still keep asking ourselves: why?

So, during the stay there, I did release some ejaculate. And refreshed I arrived home from a fly and drive back home, where I was greeted by my wife. The rest of the evening was uneventful and I went to bed early, being all revived again the following day to come to work.

It was after midnight that I woke up again, and something that was, to me, a brand new experience. I felt my wife's lips on mine, kissing me softly, and in the darkness I saw her hovering over me. It actually took me some time to realize that what woke me up, was her hands on my erect cock, her soft hands jerking the skin up and down, producing some pre-cum already while I barely had my eyes open.

"I missed you. I want you." she said softly, and her continuous motion already had mesmerized me. Her naked body, her breasts so close to me. Usually, when we have sex, we have a lot of foreplay. But this time, I saw a whole different beast in my very own wife. The woman who rather watched Criminal Minds than anything erotic. Here she was, suddenly, the woman I met so many years ago, already crawling over me and her soft intimate lips spreading over my cock. With a fluid motion she slid over me till her crotch hit mine, her very wetness making the movement extremely slippery.

Now, I don't know how many of you have a not such a desirable sex life at home. But you might
know the feeling of when that happens, also not to put too much effort in it anymore. Sex will become the basic movements and 'Oh!' (You) and 'Oh! (Her, sadly enough sometimes optional) and done. With us it is mostly the same, although the 'Oh!' (Her) I try to squeeze into it when possible. But you never really go outside of the box.
But I was tired, not completely awake, and we became dirty again. She grinded herself on me, thrusting my cock hitting her womb. It was pure fucking, not in a negative way. In an extremely good way. It was the honest porno fuck. Twenty minutes of raw intercourse., and it became better and better with every moment. Especially when I talked to her mentioning her fucking her favorite tv star. 'You want Jim Caviezel to fuck you, no?' I said. She always try to stay in control, but when I mentioned that I was him (Yeah, right!, I wish!) and how it was to have his cock bare inside of her, she moaned, mentioning she needed him inside of her. The thought for her got into her mind, and I noticed it in her temperature and behavior.
'Do you want him to cum inside of you?'
'Hmmmm... yeah!'
'Do you want him to shoot his sperm inside your tight pussy?'
'I want it!'
'Do you want him to knock you up?'
And this role game came to an explosive end for both of us, at the same time, when she told me strongly; 'Yessss, Fuck me pregnant! Fuck Me! Cum!'
And I felt myself explode, shooting my ropes of come deep inside of her. Feeling our juices together mix and covering us both.

She told me she actually felt a bit ashamed of it, the day after. I mentioned I liked it a lot, and that I am not a jealous type in that way.

Of course, we haven't had sex since. But that was to be expected. But sometimes, there are these little moments, that just make things feel better.... seem I don't always have to be with another woman. This time, I have been good!

The Thing About Cheating is...

There is something weird about cheating. I noticed this over the last couple of weeks, and that is the following; you understand it when you do it, but if you do not, you don't know really what it is about. A lot of people are prejudiced, and almost no-one who is understands the real situation.

There are different levels of cheating, and I think you can categorize them in three levels:
- The person who cannot be monogamous.
- The person who has given in to temptation.
- The person who is seeking passionate/sexual attention that is not found in the existing relationship.

Let's not forget one thing; do never underestimate the second point. If there is even the slightest element of desire, even so well concealed, a person has to be made out of stone to resist temptation. When I met the woman I would cheat with, and that actually got me confessing to my wife, it was anything but about sex and cheating. Worse, the reason why we met was simple, we both got to know each other to resist the temptation.

Let me clarify. I knew the desire was there. The sex life in my marriage was nearly non-existing but that doesn't mean that the mind and body do not desire the sexual attention so much. But it was my idea to try to control it. As I mentioned before; I love my wife. I don't want to cheat. But when the desire takes over, the only thing you can think about is holding someone else, kissing their neck, feel the thighs wrapped around you, the moaning in your ear, the soft pressure of her breasts... the intense orgasms...

I actually needed help from someone who knew how to deal with this. And I found this someone. She had been in the same situation, but was able to manage it after a long time, and she had all kinds of tricks. And it worked actually pretty well, and got my mind off it. A while later she mentioned she would be in the neighborhood of where I work, and she asked me for some coffee during my break.
We met, had a very nice simple talk, nothing going on. But when we said our goodbye's and leaned in for a quick kiss on the cheeks, it ended up in a deep passionate kiss, and within minutes I heard her moaning while I fingered her in my car.

I, personally believe that if both people have a desire, there is no way to resist it, no matter how strong you think you are. Since then, I will never utter the words that I will never cheat again. Maybe I mean it, but I know, that if I am in the same situation, I am not in control at all. If you want to control it, control the situation, and avoid it.

But then, the other question is, should you?

That takes us to the third point; the person who is seeking passionate/sexual attention that is not found in the
existing relationship.
When you get married, or in any relationship, keep in mind that there is also a sexual expectation, just as much as there is one of love and caring. When you decide to be in a permanent relationship, you ought to know the other's sexual desires and level. This is not something that you can ignore.

Now, there are a hundred ways that sex leaves a relationship. Stress, lack of love, hormonal issues, medical issues, age, sexual incompatibility... and many more. The thing is, although we all know to work out our problems, fights and disagreements  no-one is actually working out their sexual problems. It is still too much of a taboo, even in a close or kinky marriage. Mentioning something about sexual problems is like saying the other is not good. And that is often not where you want to take a conversation.

The other thing is, that even if you can talk about it, I personally don't like to have sex with someone who doesn't want it. I know my wife often just doesn't want it, and I don't want her to do it just so I can have my fun. I don't work that way.
I rather find sex somewhere else so I don't bother my wife, and she doesn't have to do it when she doesn't want to, while someone else can be a perfect sexual match. I am not looking for love, just looking for a passionate match.

I personally think that cheating can have a solid place in a solid relationship. But, like with everything else, be prepared to take the consequences.

Now, this leaves one more point to discuss, the person that cannot be monogamous.

I think the 'cheating' going on here is on this person him or herself. I such a person understand him or herself completely, they would know a relationship is not for them, because the desire of being with someone new is simply too much.

And then there is the whole bunch of people being so negative about cheating. Sure, cheating is a game you play that has a lot of rules and traps and pitfalls. And playing the game means you have to be extremely careful. And also, a lot of people actually play the game.
And one of the rule is never to attract the attention to yourself. And the best way to do that is showing disgust on the subject. So, well, yes, in my personal opinion, the people yelling the hardest that cheating is so wrong are falling in one of two categories;

1. The people who secretly cheat themselves.
2. The people who will never get the attention that allows them to cheat.

But, again, that is my personal opinion. No proven facts here. Just my mind written down on a piece of empty web page.